Aussie rules.....a generalization ;-)
Posted by mortal
IN GENERAL
1. Never take an open stubby to a job interview.
2. Always identify people in your paddocks before shooting at them.
3. It's tacky to take an esky to church.
4. If you have to vacuum the bed, it's time to change the sheets.
5. Even if you're certain you're included in the will, it's rude to take your ute and trailer to the funeral.
DINING OUT.
1. When decanting wine from the box, tilt the paper cup and pour slowly so as not to bruise the wine.
2. If drinking directly from the bottle, hold it with only one hand.
ENTERTAINING IN YOUR HOME.
1. A centre piece for the table should never be anything prepared by a taxidermist.
2. Don't allow the dog to eat at the table, no matter how good his manners.
PERSONAL HYGIENE.
1. While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this should be done in private, using one's OWN ute keys.
2. Even if you live alone, deodorant isn't a waste of money.
3. Extensive use of deodorant can only delay bathing by a few days.
4. Dirt and grease under the fingernails is a no-no, it alters the taste of finger foods and if you are a woman it can draw attention away from your jewellery.
DATING.
1. Always offer to bait your date's hook - especially on the first date.
2. Be assertive. Let her know you're interested: "I've been wanting to go out with you ever since I read that stuff on the dunny door two years ago."
3. Establish with her parents what time she's expected back. Some will say 11:00 PM, others might say "Monday." If the latter is the answer, it's
the man's responsibility to get her to school on time.
THEATRE ETIQUETTE.
1. Crying babies should be taken to the lobby and picked up after the movie ends.
2. Refrain from yelling abuse at characters on the screen. Tests have proven they can't hear you.
WEDDINGS.
1. Livestock is a poor choice for a wedding gift.
2. Kissing the bride for more than five seconds may cause a drop in your popularity. (Excessive use of the tongue is also considered out of
place)
3. For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A tracksuit with a cummerbund and a clean football jumper can create a tacky appearance.
4. Though uncomfortable, say "yes" to socks and shoes for the occasion.
DRIVING ETIQUETTE.
1. Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles, even if your guns are loaded and the roo is in your rifle sight.
2. When entering a roundabout, the vehicle with the largest roo bar doesn't always have the right of way.
3. Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape.
4. When sending your wife down the road with a petrol can, it's impolite to ask her to bring back beer as well
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to.
[www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Central
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/07/2010 09:41AM by mortal.
1. Never take an open stubby to a job interview.
2. Always identify people in your paddocks before shooting at them.
3. It's tacky to take an esky to church.
4. If you have to vacuum the bed, it's time to change the sheets.
5. Even if you're certain you're included in the will, it's rude to take your ute and trailer to the funeral.
DINING OUT.
1. When decanting wine from the box, tilt the paper cup and pour slowly so as not to bruise the wine.
2. If drinking directly from the bottle, hold it with only one hand.
ENTERTAINING IN YOUR HOME.
1. A centre piece for the table should never be anything prepared by a taxidermist.
2. Don't allow the dog to eat at the table, no matter how good his manners.
PERSONAL HYGIENE.
1. While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this should be done in private, using one's OWN ute keys.
2. Even if you live alone, deodorant isn't a waste of money.
3. Extensive use of deodorant can only delay bathing by a few days.
4. Dirt and grease under the fingernails is a no-no, it alters the taste of finger foods and if you are a woman it can draw attention away from your jewellery.
DATING.
1. Always offer to bait your date's hook - especially on the first date.
2. Be assertive. Let her know you're interested: "I've been wanting to go out with you ever since I read that stuff on the dunny door two years ago."
3. Establish with her parents what time she's expected back. Some will say 11:00 PM, others might say "Monday." If the latter is the answer, it's
the man's responsibility to get her to school on time.
THEATRE ETIQUETTE.
1. Crying babies should be taken to the lobby and picked up after the movie ends.
2. Refrain from yelling abuse at characters on the screen. Tests have proven they can't hear you.
WEDDINGS.
1. Livestock is a poor choice for a wedding gift.
2. Kissing the bride for more than five seconds may cause a drop in your popularity. (Excessive use of the tongue is also considered out of
place)
3. For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A tracksuit with a cummerbund and a clean football jumper can create a tacky appearance.
4. Though uncomfortable, say "yes" to socks and shoes for the occasion.
DRIVING ETIQUETTE.
1. Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles, even if your guns are loaded and the roo is in your rifle sight.
2. When entering a roundabout, the vehicle with the largest roo bar doesn't always have the right of way.
3. Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape.
4. When sending your wife down the road with a petrol can, it's impolite to ask her to bring back beer as well
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to.
[www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 CentralEdited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/07/2010 09:41AM by mortal.
classic
2013 - Nando must come through..
lol i use my keys to clean my ears
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
Has to be ute keys, I have a hilux, so I'm right.
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to. [www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Central
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to.
[www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Centralyer i got a hilux too. its good it gets right in there cause its a long key
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
LOL, you got it. Mine's a crew cab with a drop side aluminum tray. Got rid of the tub real quick.
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to. [www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Central
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to.
[www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Centralnah steel tray for me except i went under a low tree and managed to bend the the bit that comes up behind the cab
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
pics or it didn't happen lol!
My Suzi Sierra
Old pic of the Hilux, before the tray was fitted. I dumped the tub at the tip.....and I've since seen them on ebay for good dollars. Cie-la-vie.
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to. [www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Central
My Suzi Sierra
Old pic of the Hilux, before the tray was fitted. I dumped the tub at the tip.....and I've since seen them on ebay for good dollars. Cie-la-vie.
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to.
[www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Centralthis is my dodgey hilux bought it second hand from a dude in rockhampton with 180,000 on the clock now done over 205,000 but its my work ute so its had countless paint drums spilt in it plus someone tried to break into it and snapped my ariel. the tray has really got some srious surface rust on it but is still good. you can see the damage of what the branch did i think i was going 15kph when i hit it it ripped the lights off the top and bent the tray and steel on top. pretty nasty damage but as i said it a work ute so im going to run it into the ground and the engine still runs like new but then again it is a hilux. here are some pics of it and the damage.
mortal u should have turned the tub into a trailor
__________________________________________________________________________
mortal u should have turned the tub into a trailor
__________________________________________________________________________
LOL, I see what you did there....
Here's a vid of a Hilux running a red light. Don't know where it is tho.
Red Light Run 2.7mb
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to. [www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Central
Here's a vid of a Hilux running a red light. Don't know where it is tho.
Red Light Run 2.7mb
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to.
[www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Centralmmm, Hilux...indestructible!
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to. [www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Central
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to.
[www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 CentralThat's a generalization. The point of the vid is what happens if you are dumb enough to run a red light. That it is a Hilux is purely coincidental. The vid was emailed to me today.
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to. [www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Central
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to.
[www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Centrali'd prefer to call it a generalisation, given the thread's subject .... 
It is now.
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to. [www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Central
[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to.
[www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Centrali dont drive like a nutcase i was just unlucky
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
Sorry, only registered users may post in this forum.