The next time someone says "That car is sexy", be afraid.....

Posted by Covfan 
MECHANIC Chris Donald loves his work — he has sex with CARS.

And he admitted last night: “Some men like boobs and bums, but I much prefer curvy bodywork.”

Chris, 38, has a recognised psychological condition that makes him physically attracted to motors.

He has had sex with more than 30 different models in 20 years — plus two motorboats and a pal’s JETSKI.

Chris, who DOES have a girlfriend, confessed: “A nice car for me is a feast for the senses. It’s about smells, feelings and tastes. If I see a gorgeous Mercedes I know I’d love to jump into bed with it.”

His weird obsession mirrors that of electrician Karl Watkins, who The Sun revealed was jailed for having sex with pavements in Redditch, Worcs, in 1993.

Chris has his own website devoted to his bizarre fetish — and claims there are 500 other cranks like him, including women.

But unlike doggers who have sex with strangers in chilly car parks, the motor engineer uses a heated and carpeted double garage at his home for the strange liaisons.

He has met more than 20 people online who have driven their cars over for a service.

Most like to video Chris exhausting himself — while they are pleasuring THEMSELVES.

Chris said: “It’s all about imagination and creativity. There’s more to car love than exhaust pipes. Stroking the body panels and delicate touching makes excellent foreplay.”

And he bragged: “I did have the exhausts custom made for one car because they were too small. I had them widened and rounded.

“The firm never asked why — but I loved the view while she was up on the ramp and they were working on her. I love all aspects of cars. Some people even like to taste mechanical fluids, but that’s going too far.”

Chris, who lives in the West Country, has made love to top motors including a Bentley Arnage, Porsche and Jaguar XK8.

He has also owned a string of cars that have been the object of his affections — with the latest a black 2.5litre Jaguar X-Type with cream leather upholstery.

Chris writes stories about “auto-eroticism” on his website and has penned a manual called How To Make Love To A Car.

Experts believe his fetish is the result of a condition called paraphilia, meaning unusual sexual behaviour. They also believe it stemmed from childhood incidents.

Chris said:

At a young age I’d had a girlfriend or two and as I got older had plenty of other varied partners — cars just happened to be there for me too.

I became really interested in them at 17 when I had the first one I really loved, a blue Peugeot 205 that I called Laura.

Then there was Lydia, a BMW 735i that was tuned and lowered. She was special.

Car lovers vary — a few like to remain faithful to one car all their life, others like to play the car park. Now I don’t get as emotionally attached to individual cars as I used to. They are not a substitute for humans. The truth is the opposite.

To be fascinated with any subject you have to be passionate and I love dealing with real people.

I’ve been honest about my fetish with my partners — male and female — and only one girl was jealous. I’m currently in a long-term relationship and I couldn’t be happier.

Chris believes one spark for his fetish was 1980s cult TV series Knight Rider, starring David Hasselhof and featuring a talking car.

He said: “When I was a young boy I used to see human qualities in cars. As I grew up I noticed I was having feelings towards cars and they began catching my eye in a certain way.”

Chris saw a psychiatrist when he was 17 and says he was told his fetish was nothing to worry about.

Another expert, forensic psychologist Dr Keith Ashcroft — who specialises in human sexual behaviour — said yesterday: “This is a very unusual condition.

“But if you consider how cars are sexualised in modern advertising it is perhaps not a surprise.

“Within the broad range of sexual activity it is at the extreme edge, but it is not something for which he requires treatment.”


*Is afraid*
“The firm never asked why — but I loved the view while she was up on the ramp and they were working on her. I love all aspects of cars. Some people even like to taste mechanical fluids, but that’s going too far.”

THATS going too far =/

A funny read :p

(Y).






"Trulli was slowing down like he wanted to have a picnic" LOL
lock. him. up.




RIP Jules, never to be forgotten. #KeepFightingMichael
Don't lock him up. :) It was a funny article to read, bordering on the surreal, but he doesn't come across as dangerous - so there's no reason to take him out of public circulation (unlike the man who was arrested for having sex with pavements - LOL!!!).

A bizarre condition, but good on the media source in this case for treating the issue with the respect it deserves.



K*bots UK, specialist providers of 'fun science' Curriculum Enhancement days for Primary and Secondary schools in Britain.

Please find us on [en.wikipedia.org] for more information.
His parnter must be just as mad, if not worse tbf =/






"Trulli was slowing down like he wanted to have a picnic" LOL
Locke Cole Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Don't lock him up. :) It was a funny article to
> read, bordering on the surreal, but he doesn't
> come across as dangerous - so there's no reason to
> take him out of public circulation (unlike the man
> who was arrested for having sex with pavements -
> LOL!!!).
>
> A bizarre condition, but good on the media source
> in this case for treating the issue with the
> respect it deserves.


sounds to me you're a little too understanding of this guy, you're not boning BMW's or fondling Fords or mollesting Mercs are you? ;)




RIP Jules, never to be forgotten. #KeepFightingMichael
Locke Cole Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> (unlike the man who was arrested for having sex with pavements -
> LOL!!!).
>

Yeah, that guy was a complete cyclepath! ;)

ROFL cynic, quote of the year so far!!



K*bots UK, specialist providers of 'fun science' Curriculum Enhancement days for Primary and Secondary schools in Britain.

Please find us on [en.wikipedia.org] for more information.
Everyone has to get their bit of fame somehow don't they...



erm... speechless.
From now on Karl Watkins officially is my hero.






REHAB IS FOR QUITTERS
Is there a link to his website :-) That could be interesting to see.


[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to. :-) [www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Central
Exhausts? I'm guessing they aren't hot when he does his business. :/

"Thats hot!" [/Paris Hilton]





Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/10/2007 12:25AM by -Mikey-.
I don't want to know how he checks his oil.


Or tops it up, come to that... :|



RedSam
Winner: Not the Nickv Comment of the Year 2009

Due to the voting system in Germany, Governments are always made up of coalitions of different parties. At the last election, an almost unprecidented result saw the CDU/CSU (rough equivilant of the Conservatives) go into Government with the SPD (rough equivilant of Labour)
"Who knew trawling the internet for underage Hondas could bring so much joy?"
lmao!!!!!!!!!






"Trulli was slowing down like he wanted to have a picnic" LOL
good banter guys!

/removes penis from exhaust pipe

-----------------

She says brief things, her love’s a pony
My love’s subliminal
-qwerty- Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> good banter guys!
>
> /removes penis from exhaust pipe

I remember seeing one photo of a bloke doing that somewhere in the Net and it was posted in here a long time ago...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Did your birth certificate come with an apology letter from Durex?
so.. This whole thing is joke right? :S

and if not then I wud prefer to see some link(s) to anypage about this crap.. :D

Kimi, so, Massa Fernando Sebastian is faster than you. Can you confirm you understood that message?
Sorry, only registered users may post in this forum.

Click here to login

Maintainer: mortal, stephan | Design: stephan, Lo2k | Moderatoren: mortal, TomMK, Noog, stephan | Downloads: Lo2k | Supported by: Atlassian Experts Berlin | Forum Rules | Policy