Nice poem ;)

my g'f text me this

-=-=-=

Spider, spider on the wall

You think you're smart - you know fcuk all

You're on a wall that's just been plastered

Now you're stuck you stupid bastard!




Racing Is Life. Anything that happens before or after is just waiting
Jesus may be able to heal the sick and bring the dead back to life, but he can't do shît for low fps

LMAO!!!!!


heres a crap joke i heard tonight in the local boozer


(Q) what stands 3 foot high and sits by the bed of a 9 year old?



(A) gary glitters boots






LS's Tip of the week
ESSENTIAL OILS aren't essential unless you're an engine, a gearbox or a twat

LOL

i'll explain this ext one a bit. Near dudnees theres a place called arbroath, and altho it looks a nice area, its not really, alot of under age mothers and stuff, you know?

So,

How do u circumcise an arbroath guy?

Hit his sister in the back on the head




Racing Is Life. Anything that happens before or after is just waiting
Jesus may be able to heal the sick and bring the dead back to life, but he can't do shît for low fps

or this one


bloke walks into a pub and has a orange for head



he asks the barman for a pint and he duly pours the drink and says to the customer " sorry to be rude but i cannot help buit notice that you have a orange for a head, how did that come about?"



" well " says the customer, " i was walking down the beach the other day and found a bottle, when i opened it a genie appeared and granted me 3 wishes"



the barman asks " what did you wish for?"



" well " says the customer " my first wish was that i'm a millonaire & pooff!!! i am rich"




" and the second wish" asks the barman



" well the second wish was that i met a beautiful woman who fell madly in love with at first sight, it by god that happend too"


" so what was your 3rd wish then?" asks the barman




and the customer replies " well i wished i had an orange for a head"
























now if you don't get that joke then its probably coz your not pissed, beleive me when i tell you that youy'll get a barrel full of laughs when in a pub at the end of a evening and everyones well lathered






LS's Tip of the week
ESSENTIAL OILS aren't essential unless you're an engine, a gearbox or a twat

While we're on the subject of Gary Glitter , a lil' girl hops on to Santa's knee and Santa says " And what would you like sweetie?" she replies, "I want to have some hair on my pussy just like Mummy" And Santa replies "Erm, do you mind if they're white ones" eeeeeewwwww........

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[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to. [www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Central

Q. Who invented football?
A. Jesus. He went up for the cross but was nailed by two defenders.






LS's Tip of the week
ESSENTIAL OILS aren't essential unless you're an engine, a gearbox or a twat

What if the "Three Wise Men" were women? Perhaps things would have been different.......They would have asked directions, arrived on time, bought practical gifts, helped deliver the baby and cleaned the stable. What would they have said as they left? "Did you see those sandals Mary was wearing with that gown?" "I heard that Joseph isn't even working now!" "That baby looks nothing like Joseph!" "Virgin my @ss!" I knew her at school" "That donkey they're riding has seen better days too!" "That drummer boy can beat my drum anytime!" "Wanna bet how long it takes before you get your casserole dish back?"

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[www.mediafire.com] Some say you should click it, you know you want to. [www.gp4central.com] <----GP4 Central

Not funny

Verrrry funnnnny

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REHAB IS FOR QUITTERS

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFantastic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEExcellentttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt