This is one of the first problem when I began to develop 2003 qualrule tweak. You mentioning correctly on problem with hot-seat mode with both players drive at the same team.
To fix this kind of problem is possible,
but this may screw-up timing calculation used in the tweak and--I'm afraid--may generate another bugs. I designed this tweak as realistic as possible, and sometimes must sacrifice some "unrealistic" features available in GP4.
The best solution that may eliminate this problem is by adjusting car out gap in qualrule.ini file, under CAR_OUT_GAPS section. Each line contain series of "time-lap" pairs, up to 22 pairs defined. "Time" is define car waiting (in second, default 30 seconds) before leave the pit. "Lap" is which lap of previous runner must trigger current runner to be prepared.
For example, if you drive as Tomas Enge (car 22) and your friend drive as Frentzen, modify the 3rd or 4th value in the series:
Track01 = 30,0, 30,1, 30,1....
Two first values are used by car 22 and in this case, we ignore them. The next two values are for car 21, and in this case, you may adjust them either Time or Lap values, or both as well. If you want your friend to allow waiting for approx. 3 laps, replace 30 with 270 (270 second, or 4.5 minutes with assumption 1 lap = 1.5 minutes). Using this way, the series of values may defined like this:
Track01 = 30,0, 270,1, 30,1....
Or you may consider to change lap number. replace 1 with 2 or 3. But do not define greater than 3 or next car won't triggered. Using this way, the series of values may defined like this:
Track01 = 30,0, 30,3, 30,1....
Hope this help.
In reality, doesn't matter who's
right but most important is who's
left.